Muckraker was impressed that this week the police and senior party officials were, once again, in a stampede to sternly warn “members of the general public” against using the social media to spread lies and falsehoods, thereby causing needless alarm and despondency to Zimbos, the happiest people on earth.
Muck can patriotically confirm that this was something that was long overdue because Zimbos can be so careless, unreasonable and difficult to understand… let alone please! So once in a while, it is necessary that they have to be shown the big stick.
Since last week, these people have been celebrating what they see as the coming of a chance for another celebration similar to the one that they celebrated in November 2017.
They took to the social media to swear that our Owner had to cancel his trip to the UN General Assembly (UNGA) meeting in Washington DC because of intelligence reports to the effect that a coup was imminent … what a mortuary of lies!
Until Zimbabwe has a seat on the UN Security Council, no meaningful discussions can be expected at the UNGA, so in view of this reality, our Owner made a considered decision to skip the barren event again this year … that decision was made long ago, so there was no trip that had to be cancelled.
But Zimbos would not have it! They swore that had our Owner made the blunder of leaving for UNGA-80, that would have been the end of his ownership!
What do these people want, really? After a few important trips to Japan, the Vatican, China, Swaziland and other places in recent weeks, they started making noises that our Owner was wasting too much resources on useless junkets… and as a listening Owner, he made a hard decision to skip this year’s UNGA, in order to attend to other equally more pressing national matters … and the same people are now circulating lies about a putative coup plot!
These same people forget that even last year, our Owner also did not attend UNGA-79 … so when he made the same considered decision again this year to forgo UNGA-80, lots of conspiracies swirled around. You even see them posting about a putative dossier about imaginary criminal activities of some people around our Owner, and this week’s innocent re-assignments of some politburo members by our Owner, and all these are woven into imaginary succession battles that are said to be raging in the party. Silly people! Police should deal decisively with these miscreants. Zimbos are a very happy and content people and the party is more united than never before!
- Mavhunga puts DeMbare into Chibuku quarterfinals
- Open letter to President Mnangagwa
- Feature: ‘It’s worse right now than under Mugabe’: Sikhala pays the price of opposition in solitary cell
- Masvingo turns down fire tender deal
Keep Reading
Short legs!
Lies have very short legs. They really do. Only last month, in August, government mandarins were making policy announcements to the effect that they were banning the importation of grain into the country because we have a huge surplus from the last cropping season. Fine and dandy.
A few weeks later, it emerged the country is facing a critical shortage of maize to such an extent that some major milling firms are actually shutting their milling plants.
We are reminded of similar propaganda from the days when Joseph Made was Agriculture minister … when he assured the nation of a bumper harvest, claiming to have personally done a national helicopter survey to assess the country’s maize crop... only for the country to be threatened with starvation!
We are not sure where the statistics to paint a rosy were sucked from, but what we know is this is far from the reality on the ground. That is why propaganda ought to be reasonable as to know its own limits, otherwise it runs the risk of being a madness of some sort. We all are aware that madness knows no limits, right? Okay, for now we would believe the second leg of the propaganda … that farmers are still holding grain from the Grain Marketing Boards (GMB), a laughable offence in this country. We all know that it is true that farmers, who never get paid in real money and on time by the GMB, are finally sick and tired of toiling for nothing, and could be reluctant to deliver their surplus to the parastatal, but that won’t account for the shortfall that is already evident. In the next month or two, the lies would be exposed for truly what they are… having very short legs which suit them for short sprints, but not marathons!
Gen Z effect
Those youths that are taking drugs, hanging precariously behind kombis and other risk businesses are people who have given up on life ... that carelessness with their own lives is what makes them extremely dangerous ... there comes a time when threats mean nothing to them because life itself has lost meaning to them. Those youths are very dangerous because they have nothing to protect or to lose for they have lost everything that matters … hope, future, life, desire for self-actualisation, and are instead thoroughly disappointed and even suicidal.
Just ask those that joined the so-called liberation struggle against the white settle regime what conditions they found themselves in, and chances are they will tell you their own situation was not half as bad as the current one, which should make us relieved that our own youths are (for now) just doing drugs and some such self-destructive mischief, and have not decided that enough is enough, just like their fellow Gen-Z youths in Kenya, Nepal and other parts of the world. Let no one say they were not warned!
Bewitched
Last week, two men were jailed in Zambia for allegedly trying to bewitch that country’s Owner Cde Hakainde Hichilema.
Don’t ask Muck anything about this, lest it is dangerously misunderstood to be giving our Owner’s haters ideas. All Muck can say is he is convinced the men stand a good chance of succeeding even if they are to engage the most borderline of lawyers to appeal against both their conviction and sentence … on the simple grounds that the purported victim does not even believe in witchcraft.
Recently, Hichilema was swearing that he doesn’t believe in witchcraft. He repeatedly swore this when journalist Martine Dennis asked him on her Africa Here & Now podcast about allegations he was fighting tooth and nail to access the body of his predecessor Edgar Lungu — who died in South Africa in June — for occult purposes.
“Personally, I don’t believe in witchcraft, never believed in witchcraft, as a person, as a family, as a Christian,” Hichilema swore. Only a few weeks later, he is quiet when innocent citizens are jailed for allegedly trying to bewitch him!
Whoever bewitched Africans.
Better than nothing
This week Malawians changed ownership, from Lazarus Chakwera back to Peter Mutharika. Muck can hear envious Zimbos yawning aloud!
