This week, it was revealed that the US Senate had started the process of repealing the notorious Zimbabwe Democracy and Economic Recovery Act (Zidera), a shameful George Bush-era criminal piece of legislation that sought to armtwist Zimbabwe into ending imaginary human rights and property violations.
When our Owner came into power, through that necessary military-assisted democratic process of November 2017, he vowed that he would make the country a friend of all and an enemy of none, threatening to work extra hard to ensure that all illegal sanctions imposed on the country would be removed. True to his word, the vestiges of sanctions are finally being removed!
When we tell you that our Owner is a peerless leader, this is what we mean. He did not have to do anything for the illegal sanctions to be lifted, but just doing what he is very best at — leading his people on the highway to prosperity.
In the past four short years — remember the other four years stolen by Cyclone Idai and Covid-19 and are no longer constitutionally countable — he has transformed the country’s fortunes beyond even the wildest dream of Croesus.
Despite the illegal sanctions, under our visionary Owner’s watch, the country has leapt to a level one notch above first world-class status — everything Zimbos can ever wish for — a vibrant education system across all levels, beyond world-class health facilities and the economy that is firing from all 12 cylinders!
This is unlike citizens in other African countries who still rely on second hand clothing, borehole water even in urban areas, who have to contend with raw sewer and uncollected garbage all over, still celebrate basics such as train service as “luxury”, while normalising corruption and looting. Not with our Owner who is as clean as a whistle, and after concluding Operation Restore Legacy, made sure not even a single criminal hanged around him! What exemplary leadership!
Our Owner has shown what leadership really is, earning him admission into the elite group of best leaders in the world. This has embarrassed the West, the US in particular, into this decision to ignominiously terminate its illegal sanctions programme. So impressive has been his leadership that even Donald Trump decided to copy it upon getting a second chance, shamelessly copying everything that our Owner does: from being a listening president to being as soft as wool.
With the cumbersome illegal sanctions finally removed (or can it be said with the fig leaf to hide behind having been removed?), our Owner is ready to do even more miracles; exactly the reason why Zimbos want him to live and rule forever! Live forever Munhumutapa!
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We are not unaware that there are too many Zimbos who would not want the sanctions to go. This is not unexpected even when the liberation war ended with the call to a ceasefire in December 1979, too many “nationalists” were disappointed because the war effort had become a lucrative undertaking for them. The same has happened in the case of sanctions against this country — too many families across both sides of the political isle have been sustained by a rich diet of lies around these sanctions for the past two-plus decades.
No more bits and pieces
Last week, our Owner unveiled a law school befittingly named after his important self. His detractors fumed, naturally, baselessly claiming that it was ironic that a whole law school could be named after him.
We don’t know where they get their claims from. All we know to be fact-and-a-half is that our Owner is a quintessential constitutionalist, period!
The same shameless detractors even claim that our Owner is now actually 87, not 83, as if it matters! Muck also understands that towering statues of our Owner are being erected in Harare and Bulawayo (and possible all other major cities and towns) in addition to the dozen-plus roads and other public infrastructure already named after him.
Muckraker feels that this is still not commensurate with the selfless sacrifices that this father of the soil made for this country when he single-handedly liberated it from the shackles of settler colonial rule.
Muck would suggest that Zimbos just quit doing important things in bits and pieces. Why not just name the country itself after our Owner and be done with it once and for all?
Reading one of Robin Sharma’s books, The Leader Who Has No Title, Muck came across this statement: “Poverty isn’t just a lack of money — it’s a scarcity of anything. And so many high net-worth individuals lack self-respect, a sense of well-being, physical health and internal fulfilment.”
Sounds very familiar, doesn’t it?
Impressive numbers
When Ethiopians commissioned their Grand Ethiopian Renaissance Dam (GERD) last week, which is way smaller than our own Kariba, there were ungrateful Zimbos who were yawning aloud that the US$5 billion spent on the project would be dwarfed by figures from our own dams such as Gwayi-Shangani, Marovanyati, Kunzvi and others. Wait and see, we know how to impress with numbers, they claimed!
Still on numbers, someone brought it to Muck’s attention that in 2017, vehicle number plates were costing motorists US$60, and the cost mysteriously shot to the current US$500, which the owners are now threatening to slash to a mere US$50.
Having been a Zimbo long enough, Muck finds this threat to be too good to be true. The only real threat that has materialised is the slashing of salaries of teachers, university lecturers and other government workers to “realistic” levels, so it might be important for those Zimbos that had already started rubbing their palms in salivatory anticipation to be realistic, based on their experience with their owners, so that they won’t be disappointed when it emerges that the (Mis)Information minister released draft proposals that were yet to be deliberated by cabinet … blah, blah!
If anything, by own necropolitical standards, these fees are still way too low. The fees — together with those of passports, radio licences and many others — ought to be reviewed upward again to match the excellent service delivery linked to them!
Nees and more
The fury with which Zimbos are calling for the Warriors’ coach Michael Nees to go for poor performance (or is it actually non-performance?), makes us wonder why other non-performers are allowed to continue and are even planning an extended their future with the same Zimbos.
Could it be a matter of seeking soft targets to vet pent-up bile? We say this because of the way the same Zimbos cheered last week when the Owners in Nepal were made to flee for their dear lives by that country’s own “Gen Z”. We won’t hesitate to warn anyone that Zimbabwe is not Nepal (yet)!
Chilling corruption
We hope it is not only Muck who noticed that Gift Kudakwashe “Chillmaster” Hombarume, an unlicenced driver who killed a pedestrian while driving recklessly, was slapped with an additional nine-month driving ban after the High Court protested that the magistrate court had been unduly lenient on him.
It should only be in Zimbabwe where an unlicenced someone gets, as additional punishment, a ban for doing something that he ought not to be doing in the first place! What this effectively means is that after the nine months, the chap can legally drive illegally again! Whoever took blood money from this chap is doing the very best to protect him from the law.
