HomeAnalysisQueues acts of madness, abundant fuel available!

Queues acts of madness, abundant fuel available!

“The nation refuses to recognise such a Zanu PF youth league. We want a youth league whose only solution to the myriad of challenges is solidarity marches and blaming sanctions. Have our youths been infiltrated by reasonable people? Since when?”

THE nation was surprised this week to learn that they were queuing up for fuel for no reason whatsoever.

Twitter: @MuckrakerZim

“Zimbabwe has enough fuel stocks,” the Sunday Mail declared, quoting the Energy minister, Joram Gumbo.

Now, here is a man we all know we can trust.

While we were still digesting this piece of excellent news, our rulers had even more glad tidings for the suffering povo.

Speaking after Tuesday’s Cabinet meeting, Vice-President Kembo Mohadi gave even more reassurance: “The fuel stock in the country is still adequate as reported last week.”

It therefore became apparent that all these drivers in long queues outside service stations are just doing it for fun. Who queues when fuel supply is as plentiful as it is? Quite clearly, all these fuel shortages are a figment of people’s imagination.

People should stop listening to alarmists on the internet, instead they should start listening more to their leaders. We should trust our rulers. Have they ever lied to us? Have they not assured us that they have the solution to the crisis?

Obviously, some of these shortages are being caused by needless panic buying. By our rulers’ superior logic, people are pretending to be sick and panic buying medicines, seeing as that these also appear to be in short supply.


Nobody can forget what happened the last time our rulers decided to control prices. Except, of course, our rulers themselves.

As prices rose, out came Cde Kembo to threaten businesses for daring to increase prices. All prices should come down, he thundered.

There would be “drastic measures” against all these greedy businesses, we were told.

“Government will take stern measures against those who continue to engage in such malpractices, who are bent on inflicting suffering on our people,” Mohadi said.

We all know our leaders like to pretend like they were never there before November 2017. Some of them, hearing them speak, you would think they were not even born then. Ask them about a lot of the world’s renowned economic cluelessness of former president Robert Mugabe, and they act as if they were not part of the government.

But the nation can still remember the then Industry minister, Obert Mpofu making similar threats against businesses a decade or so ago. The result then was a lot of empty shelves.

Now, Zanu PF is pretending like it does not know what happens when such orders are made, hoping that the nation has somehow lost its memory.

The masses are hoping that Zanu PF, at the very least, approaches this crisis in the way it has been doing over the past few weeks; merely pretending that nothing is happening.

That is certainly better than trying to solve it. We all know what happens when Zanu PF tries to solve a problem, especially one that it actually caused; it always gets worse.

Which is why Muckraker would like to commend the permanent secretary in Ministry of Information Ndabaningi (nick) Mangwana, who at least is taking the better option of pretending like there is no crisis. He told his Twitter followers that we have a fuel crisis because the economy is booming and industries are using more fuel.

News of this economic revival will be celebrated far and wide, once we get rid of these fake fuel queues.


Muckraker is concerned that businesses are responding to President Emmerson Mnangagwa’s “open for business” mantra by closing their businesses.

If this is not sabotage, we do not know what is.

We are glad that the national leadership at Shake Shake Building has been wise to this, and released a statement this week telling us of a “invisible political hand” behind all corporate chicanery.

This is the thanks that our President is getting from business leaders for putting them first throughout his campaign? How many “business symposiums” did the man hold with these capitalists?

How many fancy breakfasts and lunches? Only to be stabbed in the back by businesses who raise prices at the slightest sign of a mere bout of economic mismanagement?

All across Harare, we saw this this week some shops closing, lying that they were doing stock take or even training for their staff. Some were more forthright, daring to tell us that they were halting operations because of the economic uncertainty.

The party must get to the bottom of this nonsense quickly. What uncertainty are they talking about? Surely by now we are all certain that we will be rich by 2030. In fact, at the stroke of a pen, government this week decided the economy was 40% bigger.

Last Monday, Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe (RBZ) governor John Mangudya told us that the bond note remains at par with the United States dollar.

Finance minister Mthuli Ncube also said the same last Friday. And then, this week, at Chatham House over there in London, Ncube had another story. He told his audience that what we have in our bank accounts is not really at par with the US dollar.

“The market is speaking and I will not argue with it,” he said, speaking on the black market rate. Then he changed his mind again, releasing a statement on Wednesday telling us that, no, in fact, the bond is still equal to the US dollar.

So, the country is still waiting for government to tell us the true value of the bond note. Nobody knows. But we must remain calm. We shall be told shortly, as soon as government itself knows.

Errant youths

Should we be concerned about the Zanu PF Youth League? They are supposed to be the vanguard of the party. And yet, this week, they released a coherent statement calling for economic reforms without even threatening anyone?

While their elders are seeing a “invisible political hand” behind this crisis, the youth league told us that they had actually spoken to manufacturers who told them that they are not getting enough forex from RBZ, and that this is what is causing the price hikes.

“The manufacturers indicated that they are getting the foreign currency on the black market at high prices and this leads to pegging of the prices to the prevailing USD/bond rate.”

The youth league even had passably sound suggestions, such as lifting duty on raw materials. They even told us that the forex shortages and black market “is the major source of the problems bedevilling our economy”.

The nation refuses to recognise such a Zanu PF youth league. We want a youth league whose only solution to the myriad of challenges is solidarity marches and blaming sanctions. Have our youths been infiltrated by reasonable people? Since when?

Where is Obert Mpofu? He needs to investigate this insubordination real quick. If we start having a youth league that thinks, who will defend the party now?

Democracy phobia entrenched in Zanu PF

The fear of democracy by Zanu PF remains well and truly alive despite pronouncements to the contrary by President Emmerson Mnangagwa.

The Zimbabwe Congress of Trade Unions planned a demonstration against the recently announced 2% tax by government and skyrocketing prices, among other issues, has brought out the moribund party’s phobia for democracy.

The Zimbabwe Republic Police banned the demonstration citing the cholera outbreak that has left at least 49 dead.

The same police force, of course, had no such concerns when it came to allowing the graduation ceremony at the University of Zimbabwe nor did it blink at Zanu PF provincial gatherings.

What rank hypocrisy! It is this kind of duplicity that makes the country a laughing stock and justifies the derision when government brands itself as the “Second Republic”.

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