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A kiss of death from Cde Kissnot

THE Jamaican community must be feeling somewhat aggrieved by President Robert Mugabe’s recent remarks pouring scorn on the role of Jamaican men.Report by MuckRaker
Giving a lecture in the capital Mugabe showed no gratitude for the numerous Jamaicans who have backed his policies.

“In Jamaica they have freedom to smoke mbanje, men are always drunk and universities are full of women,” Mugabe said. “The men want to sing and do not go to college,”’ he was quoted as saying by the Daily News.

“Some are dreadlocked, let’s not go there.”

Several prominent dancehall artistes have been to Zimbabwe where they heaped praise on the Zimbabwean leader. Sizzla, Red Rat and Buju Banton are among the performers who have visited in recent years. But despite their support for the president, there is no reciprocity.

Rastafarians consider mbanje the “wisdom weed”.

Does this mean Sizzla who was given a farm will be a little wiser when trotting out his “wise” opinions on Mugabe’s regime in future?


The Jamaican press reports that Mugabe’s comments provoked a storm with the country’s Minister of Foreign Affairs and Foreign Trade Senator AJ Nicholson saying: “We strongly reject the suggestions contained in the news item.”

The Jamaica Observer quotes him saying: “Jamaican men and women from all walks of life have made valuable contributions to national development and have made their mark on the world stage, be it in the field of politics, diplomacy, medicine, science and technology, or sports and culture, among many others.”

The minister said the country took “immense pride in the acknowledged contribution that Jamaica has made to the liberation of southern Africa and was gratified that nations such as South Africa and Zimbabwe enjoy the right to choose their own destiny”.

“We need not remind that Jamaicans such as Marcus Garvey, Michael Manley, Bob Marley and Dudley Thompson have advocated for and inspired generations of our brothers and sisters both in Africa and in the African diaspora. We believe that our contribution to the promotion of peace and social justice is recognised and appreciated by all well-thinking people across the globe,” added Nicholson.


Reggae artiste Cocoa Tea was also peeved by the statements,  reports the Jamaica Star, saying he performed alongside fellow artiste Fantan Mojah in Zimbabwe last October.

“That statement is not a true reflection of us as a people. Jamaicans are way better than that and we are leaders but everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Sizzla is an educated artiste who has his degree for example. I don’t really know how (Mugabe) came up with that conclusion,” he said.

Fellow artiste Tony Rebel was more scathing: “That statement was meant to be an insult but it’s actually a compliment because the Jamaican culture is so influential. Why he found it necessary to include Jamaica in such a distinguished lecture (I don’t know). I wish him the best of health and hope he is not getting senile because he is over 80 years old and he needs to find a successor.”

There you have it!


Of late ZBC has been giving Zimbabwe Development Party (ZDP) leader Kissnot Mukwazhi generous airplay. His party’s policies curiously echo those of Zanu PF.

Mukwazhi has become a recognisable face on ZBC parroting Zanu PF policies and views despite masquerading as an “opposition” party leader.
In February ZDP said it had suspended operations as a standalone political movement and would work closely with Zanu PF “after realising that the revolutionary party is the only movement with a developmental agenda for Zimbabwe”.

With elections looming Mukwazhi has now emerged from the woodwork to give the impression opposition parties are in agreement to Zanu PF’s ruinous policies.

“Voices in opposition to the Copac draft constitution continue to increase from various interest groups and political players within the country,” crooned ZBC recently referring to outfits like ZDP and their ilk.

Mukwazhi also lambasted Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai for criticising the bias of the state-controlled media in Zanu PF’s favour, saying it “demonstrates his ignorance on the role and operations of the media”.

ZDP also bleated the Zanu PF mantra on security sector reform saying they were attempts by the MDC-T and its handlers to weaken Zimbabwe and “effect illegal regime change”.

This week Mukwazhi was on television again saying he concurred with Zanu PF that elections should be held this year without a new constitution.

Cde Kissnot is truly giving Zimbabweans a kiss of death. No pun intended!

The Herald is rapidly running out of serious commentators. Instead it publishes silly articles by half-baked political scientists who are nothing more than camp followers of the Mugabe regime.

On Tuesday the paper published something bizarre by Prof wa Mutika who we are told is a US-based Ugandan political scientist.

He doesn’t appear to have benefited anything by living in the States. His article was a childish apologia for the regime. “President Mugabe has single-handedly raised the profile of the southern African country,” he declared.

Indeed he has. It is now a byword for misrule.  “He is no doubt a hero for all rightful thinking Africans and any sound-thinking African leader should emulate his leadership style.”

Perhaps he means Michael Sata, Yahya Jammeh or King Mswati?

And who do all these pungent pundits love to hate? Raila Odinga of course as well as Morgan Tsvangirai. They are all “stooges”.

Russia and China are described as “world political fair players. Odinga is described as “nothing other than preserving white supremacy”.

Is this the best the Herald can do? And none of its journalists seem to mind working for a press that is a captive of a partisan regime. No objection to this crude propaganda and the complete abandonment of professional standards.

Meanwhile, Thabo Mbeki has been complaining about Western intervention in Libya. What he doesn’t say is Western nations pleaded with the AU to do something about Col Gaddafi’s imminent attack on his own people. They only acted when Africa failed to take decisive measures to head off the carnage.

As we warned some months ago, the lickspittle crusade is now on full throttle mode with elections looming on the horizon. Not to be left out was Higher Education minister Stan Mudenge furnishing President Mugabe with as much adulation as his vocabulary could muster.

Introducing Mugabe at the official launch of the Research and Intellectual Expo 2012 in Harare, Mudenge described him as a “colossal figure, a fountain of knowledge and wisdom, a teacher, father, fearless and consistent politician”.
Mudenge was not done, further stating that, “He has been rated one of Africa’s all-time greatest men”.

Mugabe shook his head, NewsDay reports, while the auditorium burst into laughter.


‘Small houses” should have been counted separately in the just-ended population census since they might not be that small after all, according to President Mugabe.

According to the Daily News Mugabe said: “Here in towns we have the so-called small houses. I do not know whether they are that small.

“Perhaps during the census they should have asked (people) whether you are a small house or not… you would not have obtained the truth I am sure.”
We remember not too long ago a “small house” which wound up in State House.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, something Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai is finding out the hard way.

Tsvangirai’s jilted lover Lorcadia Karimatsenga Tembo filed an urgent application in the High Court throwing the marriage slated for tomorrow in jeopardy. Although the judge gave him relief, it’s really not yet over.

Tsvangirai’s spokesperson Luke Tamborinyoka has been in firefighting mode accusing the Central Intelligence Organisation of trying to destroy his boss’s reputation ahead of elections next year.

Whether the accusations are true or not Tsvangirai’s conduct has been less than exemplary.

Let’s hope the premier finally settles down after a very adventurous bachelorhood.


The Herald reports that rank marshals known as “Mandimbandimba” last week severely assaulted two soldiers in uniform at the Charge Office bus terminus in Harare after they came to the rescue of commuters who were being harassed.
One of the touts seized the soldier by the collar, while others dragged him by the hands.

“They then took him to a food court across Angwa Street where nearly 20 touts head-butted, slapped, punched, spat in his face and threw him to the ground.”

The rank marshals also assaulted Zanu PF chairman for Chadcombe-Msasa district Itai Badze after he confronted the touts for increasing the fees they collect from kombi crews.

Despite the rampant lawlessness perpetrated by the touts, police spokesperson Chief Inspector James Sabau could only say those beaten up should report to the nearest police station.

“People who are assaulted have to report to the nearest police station or police officer. I would be able to comment if the soldiers had lodged their complaints with the police.”

One member of the “Mandimbandimba” is quoted by the Herald boasting that they have more powers than the police.

“He cannot do anything to us because even some kombis belonging to senior members in government are paying us. The people know that we exist and they do not have powers to chase us.”

The touts have grown rich overnight building mansions in leafy suburbs of Harare.

Zanu PF secretary for administration Didymus Mutasa has called on his party’s provincial administration to investigate the issue since the touts are aligned to Zanu PF, yet nothing is being done.


Meanwhile, Zanu PF Harare province youth chairperson, Jim Kunaka, who has been linked to the Chipangano militia group denied any links to the group saying he was in fact a “victim” of political violence.

In an interview with the Financial Gazette Kunaka, however, threatened to “baptise” those who did not support Zanu PF.

Taking over where Mudenge left off, Kunaka said President Mugabe should die in office.

“He must stay on and never leave power. Even if he spends his whole life in power, it is okay …Even if he lives to be 150 or 200,” he said.


The Standard reports that war veterans, led by Joseph Chinotimba, last Friday stormed Minister of Tourism and Hospitality Industry Walter Mzembi’s offices demanding an explanation as to why the recent allocation of conservancies to a few politicians was being resisted.

Chinotimba is one of the 25 Zanu PF politicians who were recently issued with 25-year hunting permits despite owning another farm in Mashonaland.
His sense of entitlement to the conservancy emanates from his claim that whites evicted his family from the Save Valley in the 1960s.

Meanwhile, the Financial Gazette stated that President Mugabe has been “shocked” by the extent of asset-grabbing in Masvingo by Zanu PF heavyweights following complaints raised by traditional chiefs he met recently.

We hope his “shock” will translate into action.


Desperate times call for desperate measures so the saying goes, something former ANC Youth League president Julius Malema can attest to. After being the butt of internet jokes and parodies Malema has formally taken ownership of a parody Twitter account.

Malema in 2010 previously threatened to “shut down” the social network following rampant tweets from the many satirical Julius Malema Twitter accounts.

The ANC youth league then issued a grammatically bizarre statement calling for the “closer” of Twitter.

“The ANC Youth League has in [sic] more than one occasion reported these impersonators and hackers, yet no action has been taken against them by the Twitter administrators. We will now approach the relevant authorities to report these hackers and call for the closer [sic] of Twitter,” ranted the ANC youth league.

After being kicked out of the ANC and in the political wilderness, Malema has been forced to go to Twitter to seek an audience.

Since taking over the @Julius_S_Malema feed, the account is littered with vitriol and typos.

One of his first tweets declared: “No surrender! No retreat! #ASIJIKI and we are not frightened by threats of those who are loosing [sic] ground.”

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