I CAN hardly wait to share the following wonderful news.
I recently inherited from my gay gangster grandfather in the UK a substantial amount in pounds.
>I had no idea how to repatriate this windfall to Zimbabwe until I read the truly effervescent supplement called “Homelink – Kumusha – Ekhaya” in your last issue. And immediately my duty was clear: somehow I must get this money home.
I fully realise of course that Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe governor Gideon Gono (who I believe is affectionately known as Giddy), can only give me 30% less than that institution called the parallel market, but I am determined to make my patriotic contribution.
I would in particular like to offer part of my good fortune for the purchase of a Malaysian tile for the roof of the first couple’s new Borrowdale palace which in turn could be named after me, or better still, a contribution to another farm for our much loved Minister of Information.